The STORY OF THE WEEK
(The STEW)
is some long, dumb story involving some short dumb guy...
| Sunday, June 12th, 2005 ~ 10:57 PM |
CHIP 'N DALE
So, today (well, actually a few days ago) I had an encounter with Chip and Dale, the chipmunks. Well, let's start at the beginning....
One of my mom's best friends was leaving to go on a cruise for a week. So, my mom, being so thoughtful, volunteered me to go mow her lawn for her. I really didn't mind b/c her yard is sure a lot smaller than ours.
So, I go over there to learn how to use her riding mower. The Yee family owns a trusty John Deere Lawn Tractor, but this one was one of those weird ones. You know, the ones with the two handles and you can spin around really fast in? Well, she has it in her garage and she tells me how to start it and all, and then says "why don't you take it for a spin?" I was like.. okay. Well, her mower was squeezed in the garage next to a bunch of bikes and stuff for me to knock over. I bet you can guess what happened. It's hard to just go straight backwards b/c you have to pull both levers back exactly right, and this being my first time.. ya.. didn't go over so well. Definitely knocked over all of the bikes on my way out.
I got the hang of it and turned myself into a pro at it... It was actually kind of fun b/c you could spin really really fast.
So, she leaves on her cruise with her kids and I come back 4 days later to mow the grass. Everything's going just fine.. until..
I see something lying in the grass. I think it's just one of the kid's or dog's toy, so I get off of the mower and lean down to pick it up. It was a little stuffed chipmunk just lying there in the grass.. surely just a dog toy. I lean down to pick it up and throw it out of the way, but then I noticed something. Flies... everywhere. Wait a minute... that's NOT A TOY.. it's a dead chipmunk. Gross! I get back on the mower and mow around it. I'll deal with it later.
Time continues and I get up to move more toys out of the path of the mower, but I'm very careful. Well, I stop one time and notice something again. It's another stuffed chipmunk.. but, as you guess, it's not stuffed. Now wait a minute, didn't I pass one not too long ago.. how did this get here? I go back and start looking around for the first one I found. I can't find it... Oh my.. this is really creeping me out.
And, ya.. I just get back on the mower and finish mowing the lawn. I call my mom to ask her how do I dispose of a dead, moving chipmunk.. b/c I don't want to dump it in her trash can b/c it's in the garage and it'll smell. So I rummage around in the garage to find a shovel and a bag. Found it. Now, the search for the hopefully dead creature.
Well, I find him pretty easily, buried in the high grass that I didn't mow. Well, it's really windy out and I have a plastic bag. So, as I scoop up Mr. chipmunk, whose fur has been totally eaten off by bugs, I have problems getting him into the bag. The bag would NOT stay open... So I start spinning around to hopefully make the wind go into the bag and make it stay open. So picture me with a dead chipmunk on the end of a shovel, spinning around trying to get a plastic bad open, all while trying not to drop the dead chipmunk on my hands. ya.. funny now, but it wasn't at the time.
After I finally bag the sucker, I almost step on the other chipmunk (so yes, there were two of them). I have to go through the process AGAIN with this second chipmunk. I bag them and I desperately need some fresh air b/c the smell.. oh my gosh.. they smell was horrific. I throw them near the side of the house.
I come back a few days later to mow again.. and well.. the bag on the side of the house has disappeared.. ya.. creepy.. And then I lock my keys in my truck and boy.. I don't want to be volunteered to mow someone else's lawn ever again...
Leave Comment...
Tracie--> That is disgusting, but I've always wanted to ride on one of those lawn mowers... I bet I wouldn't have knocked the bikes over
